This is Monkey. It is a generic name as it never really had a proper name. I got this Chimp when I was a baby and it is as if it has always been there. It is kind of a puppet monkey; you can stick your hand inside it and move its mouth. It also has long arms with velcro hands and its fingers can clip on each other so it can literally hang onto things like a monkey would. I always liked this monkey as a child because it is really realistic. For me as a child it looked real. I used to think other people - kids and adults - would be amused if I puppeteer Monkey. 

Monkey was given to me by my mother. She used to travel abroad for work and this was brought back from one of her trips to LA I think? I asked her but she doesn't remember. It was during the early 80's. 

Monkey has always been a transitional object. It has always been there with me and it provided me with some stability when my mother was sometimes there, and sometimes away. As I child I found it hard to deal with these comings and goings. So Monkey was always hanging in my room somewhere until I became a teenager and Monkey was finally packed away in a box with some other teddies. Monkey lived in a box for many years. This box also travelled between my separated parent's houses and moved countries, cities and towns. I find it amazing that Monkey didn't disappear through the years! 

The last house I lived in with my dad had a storage room. I remember Monkey lived there stored in a plastic bag with a few other teddies. One day I went in there to clear out stuff and gave away quite a few teddies but I couldn't give Monkey away. I thought wouldn't it be nice to keep Monkey for when I have kids? So there Monkey lived for another 15 years at least! On my last trip home before I became pregnant I decided to take Monkey out of his bag and give him a machine wash. He survived it! His fur doesn't look as nice, velcro is gone, and the metal clips have perforated its fingers but at least he is clean. I brought him home and he is now living in my baby daughter's bedroom. I think he looks a little scary and still haven't introduced them.
One day I will tell my daughter Monkey's story.

I hope Monkey represents this strong motherly love I feel for my daughter, this love that I felt for her 15 years prior to her birth!


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